Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Walmart: The Hell Beast of Consumerism

I hate Walmart. I really do. The store is creepy, it shoehorns itself into small communities and destroys smaller businesses absorbing like Akira on a highway. Remember when your girlfriend was squished between mechanical flesh? It was WALMART.



Walmart has also been in news NUMEROUS times for employee abuse such as women receiving fewer raises and promotions than men. These complaints are here http://walmartwatch.com/ for your internetting pleasure.

But there's this thing about Walmart and really any giant corporation. It didn't just appear out of the depths of hell and gain power through the tears of orphans. It's what is known in the business world as a SUCCESSFUL BUSINESS. A successful business can be simply described as a business that offers a product that consumers are willing to continuously buy. This is a hint to one of my points in this post.

Walmart was founded in 1972 by Sam Walton who graduated from the University of Missouri in Columbia and, after working for JC Penny out of college, in 1944 acquired the lease and franchise on Ben Franklin a variety store. By 1948, Sam had increased the revenue from $80,000 to $225,000 which is the difference between a Jaguar 2010 XFR and a McLaren MP4-12C.


This...


To this!
Yeah I barely know the difference either but it's a lot of money.

Come 1950, the landlord declined to the renew the lease forcing Sam to purchase a five and dime in Siloam Arkansas which would become the headquarters of the eventual super store. Between the 1960's and 70's, Sam hit on a great idea to achieve higher sales while keeping prices lower than competitors by reducing his profit margin. What's profit margin? Go here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Profit_margin. Anyway, by 1962 Sam had opened eleven more stores then, inspired by other discount retailers, opened his first Wal-Mart. By 1967, Sam had 24 stores across Arkansas and reached $12.6 million in sales and by 1968 opened it's first stores outside of Arkansas in Missouri and Oklahoma.

To recap, Sam in 1944 owned a Ben Franklin and 23 years later was generating $12.6 million in sales.

By 1975 Walmart (having now been traded and rechristened without the dash) was now in 9 states with 125 stores, 7,500 associates and was now generating $340.3 million. In 8 years. In 1977, Walmart made it's first corporate acquisition in Mohr Value stores and Hutcheson Shoe company. 1978, Walmart adds a pharmacy, auto servicing and jewelry departments.

By 1979, Walmart had 276 stores, 21,000 associates and had reached $1.248 BILLION in sales. In five years Walmart had reached the "B" word. For reference the national debt of the US in 1979 was $640.3 billion. I know, it's $600 billion more than Walmart BUT THEY'RE BOTH IN BILLIONS!

By 1985 there were 882 stores, 104,000 associates and was now generating $8.4 billion in revenue. Now is where we get into the nitty gritty. 1988, Sam stepped down as Chief Executive and the Walmart Supercenter was opened in Washington MIssouri which now included everything you'd come to expect from good old-fashioned Walmart PLUS a tire and oil change shop, optical center, one-hour photo processing lab, portrait studio and, depending on the store, banks, cellular telephone stores, hair and nail salons, video rental and various fast food outlets.


And they increased their produce!

Let's skip ahead in history where Walmart enters more states and quadruples it's revenue to $32 billion to March 17th, 1992 when President Bush SR presents Sam Walton with the Presidential Medal of Freedom the highest civilian medal of honor for civilians who have made "an especially meritorious contribution to the security or national interests of the United States, world peace, cultural or other significant public or private endeavors". April 5th, 1992, Sam Walton dies of future irony. Or old age. Whatever, in 1992 he's dead with a medal for being awesome in business or something.


America... eatin' my lunch from a single bowl...

Let's skip ahead again to 2005 (because even I'm getting bored) had a whopping $312.4 BILLION IN SALES. That's now HALF the national debt from 1979 (but not even touching the current national debt thanks to Bush's retarded son FUTURE IRONY).

So what's the point of this long-winded history of Walmart? That it didn't pop up overnight. It was continuous consumers that built the corporation to the force it is today. And I know what you vegan, in home chefs, composting, fighting the corporation, hipster, urbanites and general AWARES will say... "That's why I don't shop at Walmart". The second point of that long winded history is Walmart is successful not because we're all idiots who can resist the fluorescent charms of the over AC'd warehouse.

Walmart DOES offer the lowest prices. It's what sent the business rocketing to Presidential Medal glory.

Imagine you need film and you're a college student who didn't have school paid for by their parents and does have to work to make rent. Imagine you need film. There's a cute shop down the street where the film is $20 a roll and Walmart in town where it's $10 a roll. Really put yourself in this scene. All you've eaten this week is Ramen. You've had to work a double and you have to midterms and a project due the next morning. You just need two photos but you're out of film and on you're last $20 for the week. And it's Tuesday. Where are you going?

If you say the cute shop you're a fucking liar, you're going to Walmart and you're lying to your friends about it you ASSHOLE.

Walmart is not the disease. It's the symptom. Walmart sprang up as money for families was dwindling. Remember how I kept bringing up the national debt? Check this out: http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-the-debt-of-the-united-states.htm
That's a site chronicling our national debt and there are a few jumps that coincide with Walmarts business success.

Simply, we're getting poorer even if we don't notice it and Walmart has deep enough roots to survive even if it does take a hit in revenue. It's always there with low prices as the "I'm fucked" option. With a national debt like that, you can't really blame people for going for the cheaper option.

And besides that, while Walmart is awful to it's employees there is something good it does. Walmart is the highest employer of the disabled and elderly in the United States. Now, that's a little inflated seeing as Walmart is the biggest corporation in the US of course it would have the highest numbers of really anything. But still, 80 years old? Run the register! Paralyzed in Vietnam? You can be a greeter! Lost half your face to leprosy? You can stock between the hours of 12am and 8! Many other businesses would consider these people to be a liability whether it's fair or not. But Walmart, having the money it does, doesn't know the meaning of the word "liability". It died with Sam Walton. And, well, in this case that's great! The handicapped and elderly need and want jobs too.


Part 1 at the end starts my point.


Oh Henry Rollins

So, yes, Walmart is terrible in it's current form. But it started as a good idea and has become a symptom of the economic disease in our country. While offering what struggling people need it destroys entire small communities and abuses it employees. But if someone has a better idea or a way for even the poorest mother on Welfare to support herself I suggest get on it or shut the fuck up.

Monday, June 14, 2010

Christianity: Oh No I Went There

Ah Christianity. Is there any other belief system that permeates almost every aspect of American life whether you're Christian or not? It's in politics, TV, film, books, music, clothing, housing. How many of us have spoken irritatedly in small groups of like minds about the ridiculousness of Sarah Palin or the still raging Under God debate? I know I have.

Let's be honest. There are quite a few Christian groups who go beyond searching for acceptance and spreading the lord's work with incredibly dividing tactics such as bombing clinics (http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2005-07-17-rudolph-monday-sentencing_x.htm), threatening death on public officials (http://tpmlivewire.talkingpointsmemo.com/2010/06/father-and-son-arrested-for-threatening-to-kill-stupak-over-health-care.php?ref=fpblg) and stepping out in the public eye to denounce other minority groups or religions as disgusting and wrong (http://www.christianaggression.org/item_display.php?type=ARTICLES&id=1108002726).

And to me, any attempt to circumvent or fight Separation of Church and State is hypocritical and a waste of time considering all the real problems there are in the US. Seriously, while people are being thrown out of their homes and cancer rates are rising, these Christian groups are more interested in pouring money into fighting their "lost right" to pray in church. YOU CAN PRAY ALL YOU FUCKING WANT. It only becomes insulting to demand through laws that everyone else pray with you.


Under God was added to the pledge in the 1950's by the way.

The list of issues with Christians is a long one.

Hell Houses. Haunted Houses run by Christian groups who replace your dad in his robe and white paint as the grim reapers with hell-worthy scenes of abortion, raves and homosexuality.

Pat Robertson. If only those Haitians hadn't made a pact with the devil.

Napoleon the Third... or whatever.

The Phelps Family: Need I say more?


Well maybe just, no, that's not what anal sex feels like.

Pentacostal summer camps familiar to doc lovers as Jesus Camp (http://www.jesuscampthemovie.com/). Camps that alternate between seminars about the evils of abortion with fun fetus action figures and breaking small children to tears for being "liars" in their faith.

But before you think this entire entry is my chance to shit all over Christianity allow me to point out the striking similarity in my small list above.

That's not Christianity... those are PEOPLE.

Nowhere in the Bible (as far as I've read granted I've only gotten to the part where Soylent Green is people) does it give directions for creating Hell Houses, running an abusive summer camp for children or disrupting funerals to protest whatevers up their ass that week nor does it have Haiti on the short list of countries that made a pact with the devil.


Although Detroit is.

Christianity cannot be strictly defined having many different interpretations being classified as an Abrahamic religion along with Islam and Judaism with the origins found in Judaism around the first and second millennium BCE during which the Hebrew bible was formed. 1,500 years later Christianity was formed following the original peace loving hippie Jesus Christ and his nailing to the cross/resurrection act (don't be offended, if you can't laugh you're dead). Come the 7th century, Islam was founded by Mohammed on the teachings of the Quran (handed down orally from Allah through the angel Jibr'il (which can be translated as Gabriel) which refers to Moses and David (who are old school) and also Jesus. For 1,300 years Judaism, Islam and Christianity were thought to be intertwined by similar histories and thought.

Here's a handy dandy timeline for the confused: http://chaos1.hypermart.net/fullsize/wrwestfs.gif

The difference came to INTERPRETATION.

Now I'm not interested (at least, not right now) in pointing out the slight amount of irony in the continuous fire fight between those three religions who all have the same idea and have shared quite a bit of bloodshed over those same ideas in our lifetime alone. But isn't it interesting nonetheless?

Christianity began with a general concept. God on high, Jesus is his son and man's messiah (prophesied in the Hebrew bible), Jesus died for our sins and taught love for our fellow man.

You know what Jesus didn't teach (at least according to the bible)? DAMNATION.

The bible is broken in two parts. Old Testament when God was sick of his kids wrecking the house every time he left for work so he tried tough love of hell fire, natural disasters and on one drunken bet (with his former dude now fallen angel douche Satan) tormenting one of his strongest followers, Job, by killing his family, taking his home and covering his worshipping ass in disease.


God also forced Job to see into the future of Christianity.

But that was old testament, man. Then came the New Testament following Jesus Christ who teachings are basically (and I say basically because I'm interpreting gospels written two thousand years ago) compassion and forgiveness.

http://www.gospel-mysteries.net/teachings-jesus.html

Now, the gospels can be and have been interpreted many different ways though the basic idea stays the same. Sometimes it's interpreted as extreme morality, sometimes as Utopian ideals and sometimes as a general map to salvation (do your best but try not to fuck anyone up). NOWHERE have I found Jesus screaming in his underwear "FOLLOW OR BE DAMNED MEDAMMIT!" It wouldn't make sense if he did. Have compassion and if you don't enjoy an eternity of torture? I'll feel sorry for you?

I mean, technically, hell has been interpreted as "grave". As in Jesus has also been sent to "hell" (Acts 2:31 KJV) before he was resurrected.

So where are these Christians coming from? It's really simple. It's called ignorance. These are Christians who have listened to each other and made their own conclusions rather than referring back to the text they laud.

Christianity has been abused so rampantly that's it's become more weapon than belief. A trigger button on a gun made of fear and stupidity wielded when all other logic has failed (despite the astounding amount of history and logic there actually IS to Christianity).

Besides, according to the Bible, if there even IS a hell then it is a fallacy that God could condemn his people to hell seeing as God is love John4:8. But beyond that only fucking GOD can condemn a sinner to Hell. Drop that paradox down the next time a Southern Baptist minister screams in your face.

My final point is such. There are over 2.2 BILLION Christians in the world. Now out of 2.2 billion a couple thousand are running around reinterpreting the religion to their needs. Really, in the scope of things, that's like saying your house party with 30 people was a bust because one drunk frat guy called your boyfriend a pussy and puked in your menses pot.

So true Christians, wear your crosses high on the neck and pray as hard as you can. You've got a lot of loud-mouthed assholes to cover up.


Go Christian GO!